Providing A Safe Space For Yourself
In our world where our friends and family have access to us twenty four hours a day, heavy workloads and feeling a constant blitz of electronic stimuli. It’s very easy to feel overwhelmed and anxious. As we lay in our beds at night this makes it very common for us to carry these feelings with us at home and make us feel uneasy by the end of the day. In this chaotic world where one would think twice before trusting a friend it’s hard to be honest with each other at times or struggle to even form an open honest conversation with oneself.
The term ‘safe space’ has several definitions. It can refer to a place that provides a physically and emotionally safe environment. Your safe space can counteract any stress or anxiety that exist in your life when you’re living away from home or even when you are living with your family. As an individual you will know about your experiences and emotions more than anybody around you so why seek peace or advice outside before giving yourself a chance when you can just make yourself aware by embracing all your feelings. When we connect to ourselves we’re also able to create lives that are meaningful and fulfilling. Focusing on your actions and feelings is also protective and makes you more aware about how you should get a hold of things in your life.
When an individual is experiencing work stress and is unable to give time at home or for themselves, realising how much they have on their plate and how much they can do is significant. One might be so stressed that they would not be able to respond to their kids at home or at times even eat proper meals a day and it can be overwhelming and harmful to both their emotional and physical health. Just giving yourself ten minutes to think about your actions while you deep breathe might make you realise many things.
A safe space initially just requires you and a will to invest in yourself.
After having a night at the club with your friends where you couldn’t handle the alcohol and you’ve been feeling low the next day, would you actually have an honest conversation with yourself and realise it was bad for you or would you go to the club again with the same people? In most cases we end up in the club again let alone tell our friends that it was too much for us.
A generation which needs to know and realise about their rights and wrongs by themselves not from their friends or family. We need a connection to ourselves at this age so we don’t end up harming ourselves or promoting that behaviour around us. It is alright to just be yourself and not drink and just dance freely in the club but an individual needs to be aware about what they are feeling first before saying it out loud. This is just an example of how things are and what other options one can have if they just understand the emotions they are feeling and accept them without bowing down to the social pressure.
Forming an open honest dialogue with yourself might require a lot of acceptance but feeling more connected to ourself is more important than feeling connected with others. In the back of our head we know that some particular actions are bad for us but we just don't allow ourselves to accept it. As we grow and we are firm about our choices we meet people who support us and stand by us but first we need to be aware about our choice and not just make one by getting influenced. It is so important to give yourself time and it's an investment to be better.
Defining a safe space can be difficult when most of us live with our families and our friends can contact us anytime but its best to begin with an open honest conversation about your safe space, where you need a bit of time for yourself. Let your friends and family know and provide you with a bit of allotted time just for you. If you’re looking to do this- just find a spot where you’re comfortable in, it could be in your room or in your house anywhere. It is always important to be somewhere where you feel comfortable in and you can allow yourself to be fully vulnerable…some people also might prefer writing but giving yourself 'alone time' is paramount. Asking yourself questions about a particular situation and using words - Why and How would help you make sense of your actions.
Even if you go through a bad breakup or a terrible fight with your friend just know your thoughts and accept your emotions instead of going out and finding an escape. By giving yourself a safe place you allow yourself to understand things better about yourself and your surroundings. I see so many of us going through tough times as we learn and grow, its absolutely normal to make mistakes but knowing your mistakes is also important otherwise one might not be able to grow at all.
In these times when there’s so much pressure to get good grades, perform good at work, dress in a certain way and making the right friends- it might put you in a dilemma but just knowing yourself better would help you make better decisions.
Be your own person before you are there for anyone.